Extra, Extra Read All About It!!!!!

On April 26, 2011, Relationships & Social Media will be taken to another level! The 550 Media in Society class will host a forum that will discuss various issues that everyone can relate to in our socitey, including social media and relationships. The event will be held at the Mississippi e-center, from 12-1:30p.m.

 You don't want to miss this event!

Connecting or Disconnecting in the Game of Love

Gone are the days of your favorite cousin hooking you up with her best guy’s cousin for what may be the date from… (I know you see where this is going!)  In today’s digital world you can find that one who my turn out to be your McDreamy or unfortunately your McScary!

Stay tuned to find out how the views of online dating have changed since it first began!

RELATIONSHIP RESOURCES

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I'm in LOVE with the computer MAN!

Whatever happened to the whole idea of courting and really getting to know a person? The times if a guy wanted to be with a woman, he had to get the third degree from the family, but most importantly the dad!! Well I’ll tell you what happened…Social Media is what happened!!

Social Media has made the traditional methods of dating so easy. Now, social media has defined dating and building a relationship as a fast 1-2 step.  It’s so convenient for people to now go on a social network site and look up information on another person; A process that took days, or even weeks to find out. Giving you an option to chat with another person, and getting instant replies to exchange information.  

Some of the negative connotation associated with Non-Tradition Dating is:

• The dangers of meeting someone off line…could be a serial killer or nothing like what they appear to be online.
• Privacy- A person knowing things about you that you yourself haven’t shared with them.
• Fantasy profile-A person has lied about majority of the things on their profile, and the other person finds out that it was all fabrication to make them interested.
• Could possibly lead to online stalking

These are just a few things that a person could experience with non-traditional methods of dating. Will we continue to let society shape our live and behaviors?



Now let’s talk about the positives of online dating via social media, which would not be possible without speaking on how dating use to be, HOW OUR PARENTS AND GRANDPARENTS DID IT!



Traditional dating includes a guy and a girl meeting or being set up by friends or family.  From there most likely they would go out on a date. In order for a relationship to blossom, it is ever so important for there to be some level of attraction which in all honesty is heavily based on physical attraction (AT LEAST WITH MOST PEOPLE).  From there couples would begin the sometimes timely and maybe at moments awkward adventure of truly getting to know each other.   

However for the new age, tech savvy, “I don’t want my mama setting me up”, “I don’t have a lot of time, but I want to date” person their best solution would be online dating via social media.  What was once viewed as TABOO just a few short years ago is now an ideal choice for many who are seeking love and companionship.

The POSITIVES of online dating include:

·        Initial Attraction- With online dating first impressions are shaped by other factors, such as age, career and hobbies because there is no face-to-face contact initially.

·        Location- When people are looking for dates online that they can search in specific areas to locate people within a defined radius from their residences.

·        Time Frame- Online dating can help a person narrow down many characteristics much quicker than could ever be done in a traditional manner.

·        Getting Acquainted-  In an online environment, people have an opportunity to sit back and chat first with no interruptions and no inhibitions. This allows people to get to know more about a person's interests, religion, and personality before meeting in person on a date.

·        Zeroing In- With online dating you have to option of pin-pointing the potential mate in which you may want.  If you only date guys with curly eyelashes then there is bound to be a site specifically for single guys with curly lashes or maybe you like girls who dig fishing there is no doubt that there is probably a specific site dedicated to those who share a passion for aquatic sports. 

Read more: Traditional Dating Vs Online Dating | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/about_5076729_traditional-dating-vs-online-dating.html#ixzz1FFd5jFN6

Let’s face it with an estimated 20 million people logging on to try online dating one is sure to benefit from the larger dating pool.  For more information about finding your special someone online check out the link below,

http://www.consumer-rankings.com/dating/ 

So there you have it the PROS and CONS of online dating!  Whichever method you choose...HAPPY DATING! 

To Be Or Not Be...Socialization is the Question

Relationships and Socialization

How we interact and socialize on different social networks has amazing affects on our lives. Take a couple that both individuals are on facebook, one person wants to choose the option to set a relationship status on facebook, the other person does not. This creates a sense of uneasiness to the relationship. The accessibility of facebook makes it easier to connect with friends and make new acquaintances, which can be detrimental on a relationship that is not acknowledged on facebook.

 Many would say that it depends on the individuals in the relationship on the labels that are acknowledged on facebook. Socialization on social networks can have its advantages and disadvantages. The behavior and attitudes that people display on social networks has a framework when considering relationships. If you are on facebook and your significant other is also on facebook, you are supposed to set your relationship status to in a relationship. Usually if one person in the relationship does not want to claim the relationship status, it is often seen as if the person has something to hide, or want to make themselves more available.

 A social network is exactly what it says…SOCIAL NETWORK, where members share common interest in certain things. The socialization part of using social networks such as facebook may include viewing and commenting on profiles, sending messages and evening poking. These are the same socialization factors that can ruin a typical relationship.

PLEASE HELP...My new Love is NOT on facebook!!!

How am I supposed to tell the world about our relationship?

Okay so what’s a guy or gal to do when they embark on a new relationship but their new “BOO” is not on facebook or any of the other ever so popular social networking sites?  How are they supposed to declare their new found love i.e. check what seems to be the ever so coveted “In a Relationship” box on the network?  How are they supposed to make their latest union public knowledge to their friends and the other 500 million random strangers on the networking site? 

In Elizabeth Morrison’s article Newcomer’s Relationships: The Role of Social Network Ties during Socialization it is stated that interactions with and relationships to experienced coworkers provide a valuable way for newcomers to learn and assimilate.  

THIS IS WHAT WE SUGGEST...

Think of your new “BOO” as a coworker in this case.  It is up to you to assimilate this man or woman to the positive side of facebook or any of the other social networks.  It is your responsibility to show them the importance of them having an account on the social network of your (as a couple) choice in order to declare to the world “YES!!! We are in a relationship and we have accepted each others relationship status requests and checked the boxes to prove it!”

STILL NOT CONVINCED?  Check out what others are saying...    

Time Magazine Article: Your Facebook Relationship Status: It's Complicated

http://www.time.com/time/business/article/0,8599,1895694,00.html

Youtube Confession:
Why Facebook relationship stasuses are the most confusing thing EVER

Have you seen my Egyptian Prince?

Since the recent resignation of previous President Hosni Mubarak, Egypt now has a sense of hope.

This is the breakdown

Egypt protesters across the Arab land were protesting their frustrations against governments, high levels of corruption, and ridiculous poverty rate. Thousands of protesters took the streets of Egypt to shout out their frustrations. The protestors were gassed and beaten.

The protests actually started online and then went to the streets. Egyptians used twitter to communicate their location and post videos of the protests and crowds. This caused the Egyptian government to shut down Internet access and restrict cell phone use.

                                                      Back to Relationships 101
                                                                Akim's Corner

I’m sure we all know someone or at least have heard of someone who has gone out on a date with a person they met via Facebook or some other popular social network, if not keep reading and surely someone will come to mind.

This week we’re using the country of Egypt as our springboard for a snapshot look into relationships and social networks.  Since Egypt is a predominantly Sunni Muslim country we are going to look at the dating and courting rituals of these members of the Egyptian population. 

A reader asked About.com “Do Muslims date? If they don't, how do they decide whom to marry?”

The website’s response was as follows: "Dating" as it is currently practiced in much of the world does not exist among Muslims. Young Muslim men and women (or boys and girls) do not enter into one-on-one intimate relationships, spending time alone together, "getting to know each other" in a very deep way before deciding whether that's the person they will marry. Rather, in Islam pre-marital relationships of any kind between members of the opposite sex is forbidden.

Ok, we already know while lengthy in description the answer really does not get to the nuts and bolts of why and if it would be possible for a young Sunni man or woman to date via social networks.  Let’s press on and find out more.

So, how do potential spouses meet?

First of all, Muslim youth develop very close friendships with their same-sex peers. This "sisterhood" or "brotherhood" that develops when they are young continues throughout their lives, and serves as a network to become familiar with other families. When a young person decides to get married, the following steps often take place:

•             The young person makes du'a for Allah to help him or her find the right person.

•             The family enquires, discusses, and suggests candidates from among the network of people that they know. They consult with each other to narrow down potential prospects. Usually the father or mother approaches the other family to suggest a meeting.

•             If the young couple and their families agree, the couple meets in a chaperoned, group environment. Umar related that the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "Not one of you should meet a woman alone unless she is accompanied by a relative (mahram)." The Prophet also reportedly said, "Whenever a man is alone with a woman, Satan is the third among them." When young people are getting to know each other, being alone together is a temptation toward wrongdoing. At all times, Muslims should follow the commands of the Qur'an (24:30-31) to "lower their gaze and guard their modesty...." Islam recognizes that we are human and are given to human weakness, so this rule provides safeguards for our own sake.

•             If the couple seems compatible, the families may investigate further - talking with friends, family, Islamic leaders, co-workers, etc. to learn about the character of the potential spouse.

•             Before making a final decision, the couple prays salat-l-istikhara (prayer for guidance) to seek Allah's help and guidance.

•             The couple agrees to pursue marriage or part ways. Islam has given this freedom of choice to both young men and women - they cannot be forced into a marriage that they don't want.

This type of focused courtship helps ensure the strength of the marriage, by drawing upon family elders' wisdom and guidance in this important life decision. Family involvement in the choice of a marriage partner helps assure that the choice is based not on romantic notions, but rather on a careful, objective evaluation of the compatibility of the couple. That is why these marriages often prove successful in the long-term.

So there you have it!!!!  With these precise steps rooted in faith, family and tradition there is no room for the intervening of social networks.   In spite of the technology that is used in today’s world, it is rather refreshing to see a culture committed to continuing in the practices that have yielded much success in years gone by.  It’s like they say “If it aint broke, don’t fix it!” 

It's ME or FACEBOOK!!!

Often times peoples relationships are defined by the social media framework. You’re either single, in a relationships, in a complicated relationship, or just friends. Social Media sites such as Facebook and Twitter, have begun to take too much affect in people’s relationships.

Have you been a victim?

Has your significant other questioned your motives or usage of fabebook?

Why are you friends with him/her?

Why don’t you have our relationship status posted?

What was that comment on your wall all about?

Sounds familiar?...This is a case we like to call “socially doomed,” anything you say or do on these social media outlets, your doomed if you do, doomed if you don’t.

Check this video out!!

Status Please???
 If you’re on Facebook chances are you have checked a response in the relationship category.  With one little click of the mouse you can proclaim to the world or at least the world of Facebook that “I'm taken” or that “I’m waiting to be taken”!  Does this check of the relationship status really matter or is it just a waste of digital space?  Does it really have an effect on people’s lives outside of the realm of the social media?

Will you let facebook end your relationship?